


and i don’t want the world to see me (i just want you to know who i am)

by hoshikyuu



Series: apple tart and sugar cookies [1]
Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: 1k+ words of fluff, Established Relationship, I Can't Believe I Wrote This, I Will Go Down With This Ship, M/M, My one true rarepair, pure fluff, this is just fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-11-11
Updated: 2015-11-11
Packaged: 2018-05-01 01:32:28
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,297
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5187110
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hoshikyuu/pseuds/hoshikyuu
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It's a slow evening Kenma decides to share his thoughts with his boyfriend.</p>
            </blockquote>





	and i don’t want the world to see me (i just want you to know who i am)

**Author's Note:**

> Alright guys, here it is.
> 
> My ultimate ship.
> 
> The rarest rarepair to rare pair.
> 
> Don't judge me, it's 1AM and this is unedited and unbeta'ed, and my first HQ!! fanfiction also.
> 
> But I am the mother to this ship and I needed fanfiction for it, how bad it might be. (I can't write fluff.)
> 
> Anyways.
> 
> Enjoy! If ya wanna talk to me, my tumblr is "Hoshikyuu", and I might post doodles to this at "hoshi-doodles"!

How long had it been since he felt so at peace?

 

Kenma wasn't exactly sure. Not that he'd usually bother remembering such things.

 

Probably a long time ago, considering most of his after school time was spent with his team or Kuroo, and they were never quiet. Always causing a ruckus.

 

Just sitting like this, silence engulfing them save the tiny clicking noises of his game's buttons and the sound of breathing, feels incredibly peaceful, putting him at an ease he can't remember ever feeling before.

 

He likes it.

 

Kenma pauses his game and puts it down in his lap.

 

The fingers weaving their way through his hair, from the dark roots all the way down to the bleached tips, calloused fingertips softly bumping the shell of his ear occasionally, are soothing. The warmth engulfing him from the hug is nice. The calm breathing behind him, forming a melody with the heartbeat of the person embracing him, is nice. How he knows what Kenma needs, his time alone or reassuring words, how he is someone who  
will back up when Kenma needs it but won't feel offended and accept him into a hug a few moments later still. Someone who will drag him out of his cave of a room occasionally, forcing him into the social interactions he needs at times, if he is honest, but can't seem to engage in. It's all nice.

 

Koushi is nice.

 

No, not nice. Great. Amazing. Stunning.

 

Breathtaking.

 

"What are you thinking about?"

 

The air blown against his ear with the silent whisper tickles.

 

"You," Kenma murmurs, and he feels the chuckle running through Koushi more than he hears it, the slow vibration making him feel warm to the bones.

 

"Me? Why, thank you, but why?"

 

Kenma stays silent as an answer, lifting the hand Koushi had places on his stomach and raises it until his lover can not only feel, but see Kenma interlacing their fingers.

 

"For no good reason. Can I not?"

 

Koushi pulls him closer, pressing their bodies together when his hug around Kenma’s middle tightens, and Kenma lets his head fall on the older boys shoulder. Koushi starts tracing slow patterns on the back of his boyfriends smaller hand, the feeling of his warm, rough fingertips sending goosebumps over Kenma's arms, and a hum of content resonates between them.

 

"What exactly were you thinking about me?" Koushi softly breaths into Kenma's ear, and coming from anyone else, the blond boy would've shied away, the question too invasive to him to even briefly consider answering, but this was Koushi. Koushi, who knew better than to prester Kenma, whose questions were just that - questions of pure curiosity. He wasn't trying to be noisy, or pushy, he was interested only, but if Kenma didn't want to answer, Koushi accepted that just as fine.

 

"I'm thinking that you are amazing.” Kenma mutters after a short silence neither of them wanted or needed to break, for Koushi knew Kenma liked to think over whatever he was going to say first.

 

A low sound leaves the ashen haired boy, a mixture between surprise, chuckle and affectionate hum, but he keeps silent because he feels like Kenma was going to say more.

 

“I'm thinking about how well you know me, and how well I know you, but you still always manage to surprise me in your words and actions. You're exciting, you're calming. I'm thinking about your mischievous side, the smug grins and little pranks, and your sweet side, the warm smiles and how you care for everyone.”

 

Kenma's voice is calm, silent but steady in the dimly lit room, slowly illustrating his thoughts with words he chooses unhurriedly. He pauses, resting his gaze on their joined hands, and runs his thumb over the soft skin on the back of Koushi's hand.

 

“I think about the days you get up at midnight to bake cookies because you carved sugar, and about the contest you had with Kuro about who could handle spicy food better. I think about how you bring me apple tarts and pick out the carrots of your stir rice for me because you know I like them a lot. I think about how you snore when your nose is stuffed and how you never throw Zelda or Link off the couch or the bed but drape yourself around them.”

 

He breaths out, a smile pulling up the corners of his mouth, and turns, winding his way out of the embrace, just far enough so he can see Koushi's face during his last words, shakily whispered into the silence of their bedroom.

 

“I think that you're amazing, and stunning, and breathtaking, and many more things I can't even start to put into words. I love you. That's what I think about you.”

 

Kenma is staring at his boyfriend mutely, trying to read him as he always does, read the emotions deep inside the other to calm his own raging sea of feelings, but Koushi's face is still as a statue, flat and ungiving, and Kenma feels slight panic starting to bubble up in the depths of his guts. He lowers his head, his hair falling into his face and hiding him from the older boy, a habit he had thought he'd lost around his boyfriend.

 

They sit in silence until a squeeze on his hands makes Kenma snap up his head, and his eyes go wide at the sight before him.

 

Koushi's face is burning red, from the tip of his ears to the dip of his collarbones disappearing under his shirt, crimson flares, and his eyes are wide and shining with unshed tears, threatening to fall any second. Kenma, shocked and unsure what to do, internally prepares to retreat, sure to have upset Koushi in some way when said young man lunges forward, gathering Kenma in a hug that sends them both sprawled out onto the ground of their mattress.

 

He's shaking, and a few gasps for breath later he breaks into laughing, carefree, loud, happy laughter, a sound ringing in the blonds ears like the chiming of bells, a blissful melody to him like nothing else, and, after recovering from the initial shock, snakes his arms around the person on top of him, pulling him close and pressing his face into his hair.

 

“Goodness, Kenma,” he heaves out, resting his forehead against Kenma's and letting their noses touch softly, “for a second there, I was afraid you'd break up with me.”

 

A grin splits his face, teeth shining and eyes gleaming, slightly puffy, but glowing warm in delight and love.

 

“You have no idea how glad I am, in this second. To have you here with me. To know you, to be able and allowed to hold you like this, be able to to this,” he presses a short kiss to The shorter boy's forehead, “Or this,” this time the kiss ends up on his cheek, “or this,” It's the other cheek, “and especially this.”

 

This time, Kenma meets Koushi's lips halfway, a smile in both their faces after they break form the short, chaste sweet kiss.

 

“I love you too, Kenma. So much. I'm lucky to have you.”

 

He pulls his lover close and rolls them over until they both lay on their sides, and Kenma curls into his chest, his head tugged under Koushi's chin and their legs entangled. Kenma feels at peace, lying like this. Feeling their breathing even out, the warmth his lovers body radiates, the fondness with which he's being held.

 

He thinks Koushi has fallen asleep when he feels a finger poking his cheek, and a chuckled “I can't believe you beat me to this, and with such a spectacular confession on top.” drift into his ear, and he smiles.

 

“Go to sleep, Koushi.”

**Author's Note:**

> I am dead what is this hahahahaha fml


End file.
